Aug 19, 2010
In preparation for my big farewell show tomorrow (Friday, August 20th, 2010) at Mississippi Studios in Portland (where this whole crazy music thing began for me) Just Out Newsweekly ran a follow-up story today on their blog as part 2 to the interview they ran in this week’s paper. Check out today’s story HERE. You can also read the interview which ran in print in this past week’s paper HERE if ya wanna.
I really hope to see you at tomorrow’s show, friends! It’s going to be quite the spectacle. Tickets and info HERE. One last dance before I go…
For those of you who don’t like redirecting to other sites, you can read part 2 of my interview with Just Out below:
“In the current issue of Just Out, we sat down with Portland’s own Logan Lynn to discuss the recent announcement of his self-proclaimed “career suicide,” an indefinite hiatus from the music business. After a string of dates on the Pride circuit, tomorrow night’s show at Mississippi Studios marks the “farewell” performance for Lynn and his band, The Gentry, for the foreseeable future.
Since Lynn’s announcement July 29 on his website, he’s been busy committing himself to his newest project — getting involved at Q Center. “The fund-raiser is still in full effect and will be through the end of the month, though we will be keeping it where 100% of the proceeds from [downloads of new album] I Killed Tomorrow Yesterday go to Q Center even after the August push to raise funds is through,” Lynn told Just Out in an update earlier this week, adding,
‘I will be raising money for [Q Center] on Friday night as well and actually start working there this Wednesday officially so things are definitely moving forward in a direction that feels right. I tend to think that if things fall together painlessly like this then I’m where I need to be, doing what I’m supposed to be doing, etc. I’m really excited for the show … even more excited that my plan to help Q Center is working! YAY. My producer Bryan Cecil (who equally gave up his portion of the proceeds from the new record to the center) is … a superhero. It touched me that a straight male who has been working on this record with me for over a year would be just as down for the cause as his gay musical counterpart. He rules. We’ve both been frustrated with the industry for months and it has felt really punk rock to say fuck all and give the money to charity.
It’s a nice change of pace to go into the Q Center and have them be so excited about how well the record “release” is going so far instead of being worried about units sold, promotions, etc. One thing we are finding out the past 2 weeks is that people will still buy music in this day and age if the money goes to a charity they believe in. It makes me feel so proud of my fans, friends and family for coming through and being as awesome as I fancy them to be.
HELL YES, PEOPLE!! I love me some do-gooders.’
Lynn had more to say about the music business, and his decision to leave it, a couple of weeks ago. What follows is more of our interview that didn’t make the page, including the realizations that have hit “30-year-old Logan, not 5-year-old Logan, who needs to have everybody clap for him,” he explained. “I would rather have people hug me when I look sad than be like, ‘You better look happier, we’re all clapping for you.’”
Logan Lynn: That’s really what it has been so hard to deal with is that… [reconciling] my little boy self perspective of like, “You’re a huge success, buddy, good job, you got out of Nebraska,” but comparing it to my 2007 perspective of [being] freshly signed [to the Beat the World label] and “What’s gonna happen? The world is my oyster.” There’s been a lot of reality since then and it also just happened to be a recession right when I was starting and so anybody that might’ve been buying music kinda stopped.
Just Out: It could be considered a luxury, definitely.
Lynn: It really is, and I love making songs. I’ll probably still do it in some context. … And I may make videos. I mean, my relationship with Logo is still great. I have really good relationships … I think that’s what so weird, my relationships with people and the press, whoever that I work with, it’s all good. I feel like I can step back and feel good about where things are at right now.
JO: So this marks a positive point to leave it at.
Lynn: And nobody can say that it’s ‘cause I can’t think of anything else to sing about. Cause that record’s there. I’m just like, it’s there, I’m just not gonna finish.
JO: It sounds like most of your frustration stems from the business aspect of music.
Lynn: I’ve gotten my head up my ass with the business. And it’s so far up my ass that I can’t pull it out without quitting, you know?
JO: It sounds like the live, touring aspect factored prominently in your decision, too.
Lynn: Yeah. I mean, it’d be great if I could go and do a couple of shows but to understand now fully what it means to have to go on tour in order to make it happen, it’s a lot of being gone and I’m already lonely. So to just seal the deal on that seems really irresponsible for my emotional state.
But then at the same time, the flip side of that is, okay, well you take my friends … Whoever’s in my life, you put ‘em all on a board — I actually did this. And you divide it into columns. I lost some people when I quit the drugs. … So get rid of those people first. Those people are out. Then I started telling the truth, let’s get rid of those people, they don’t wanna hear the truth. I get divorced so I lose all of his people. I lose my money, so I lose my money friends. And then I’m left with the core group of people and all these people that like me cause they think they’re gonna get something from me with this music thing. So why not get rid of this music thing, be left with the people that like me, that love me, and then kinda build it from there?
JO: You really did that?
Lynn: [nodding] I have a giant dry erase board. I just put everybody that’s up there. I have a lot of people around me, I do. But I have a very few people that I call and very few people that have called me this week to see how I’m doing. That’s always interesting. …
I actually feel better just having the bullshit off, just to finally be over it, like ahhhhgggg I hate it, I hate what’s happening. Instead of being like “Everything’s so fucking great, look at the crowd.” You can’t tell that they’re 20 feet away from the stage. I’m just sick of cropping my life where it looks how I want it to instead …. because everybody who’s around me in my real life knows how it really is. I am really actually not that stoked, so to continue to crop out my frown seems silly.
JO: Hearing the new songs on I Killed Tomorrow… then, looking back on them, there certainly would appear to be telltale signs.
Lynn: It’s all about being unhappy and wanting to leave. And getting, like, that “Velocity” song is, I mean, this has been in the works for a while. I’ve just not known how to do it. … I have been mental forever. When I was little I was like, “If I could just get out of Nebraska and get to San Francisco, I’ll be happy, and I get there and I’m totally unhappy. In fact, worse. I ruin my life even, come back here and I’m like, “Well maybe I’ll go for the real dream, I’ll be successful and I’ll be able to be like, ‘Ha ha, high school kids. I told you! I’m so fucking famous, I’m on your TV.’ I mean, [the video for] ‘Feed me to the Wolves’ was On Demand in York, Nebraska and my Aunt Judy called my mom and there’s been these magical, cool moments but that still weren’t… I’m still feeling very much the same after they happened. I mean it’s great, I’m appreciative, [but] they didn’t fix the problem so that’s been the case in my career too, ever since I realized this is not going how I want it to, or it is and I’m not going how it wants me to.
I’ve had these little moments like, “Oh my god, well I’ll just get signed and then I’ll be happy,” and then I get signed and obviously I’m not happy and then I’m like, “Oh my god, my record will come out and then I’ll be happy, I’ll be in stores, I’ll see it in stores,” no. I go on tour, “tour’s gonna make me happy,” no, and so I’ve just hit a point where all those little things are gone. And I’ve gotta get happy myself, I’ve gotta figure it out because I think it’s not a smart move to try and be miserable forever, even if you can write songs about it. It’s not conducive to long-term success and the path I’m trying to go on.
JO: You think if you get happy you’ll write songs about it?
Lynn: Oh my god, wouldn’t that be neat? I did have a dream that I came [back], that I went away. In my dream I had no beard, but it seemed like I was older. But I came back with like a folk record, I spent a few years living in the mountains. I’m trying to listen to that voice like, “You gotta go, go far.” But come back with like a Holcombe Waller folk record or something… no beats… like “Ha, ha, sorry Holcombe, I stole your style.” [laughing]
I do like the idea of doing different stuff. That’s why I did this thing with the Gentry ‘cause I was so bored… [thinking to myself] “Maybe if I change this sound I’ll be happy.”
JO: So what’s next, aside from plans at Q Center and in the community?
Lynn: I’m 30. I don’t wanna look at the next 10 years like I am looking back at these last 10 years — which is almost as if they didn’t happen, where I’m like, “I don’t have much to show for it that means a lot to me aside from this music thing.” I was able to do this and fulfill my idea of what I wanted but I do not have the love in my life that I’m wanting, I do not have the free time that I’m needing and I have way more stress than I want. … I need to be feeling good about getting up and doing stuff and feeling like where I go and put my time, I’m not gonna be judged for my pants or whatever.
JO: [laughing] There’s gotta be more to life than pants.
Lynn: I’ve gotten glimpses of that. I think that what’s funny is that my music isn’t really about fluffy stuff, so to be immersed in this fluffy world is just so silly. It’s like, “Sorry we wear black and I scream. We left our boas at home, I have no idea what to tell you. I can put a wig on if you want.”
Logan Lynn and the Gentry will perform — in all likelihood sans boas or wigs — their “farewell” show on Friday night, August 20 at Mississippi Studios (3939 N. Mississippi). Show starts at 10 p.m. Matrimony and DJ Girlfriends support. Tickets are $9.50. Visit loganlynnmusic.com for more information and details on donating to Q Center in exchange for Lynn’s new, unfinished album, I Killed Tomorrow Yesterday.”