// NEW MONEY \\ 1.27.22 // Kill Rock Stars \\



Logan Lynn (2009)

It’s October 14th and I am turning 30 tomorrow. I’m feeling good about reaching this new age and am SO glad that my twenties are on their last leg as I am writing this. I woke up really early today, thinking about these 30 years I have spent on this planet so far…wondering how and why this has all happened the way it has, wishing I could change pieces of the past, missing people & parts of my life which I broke to bits or have lost along the way, and hoping I am making decisions now that will bring bucketloads of peace my way in the future.

I also have an overwhelming sense of gratitude for making it through the fire, for sorting things out with my family, and for letting go of the all-encompassing darkness in my life just in time to turn things around. I got out while I could still see the light, and now it is all around me. Thank you to all of you who loved me through the 16 year valley of drugs and despondence…even when I could not feel your love or love you back…it was you who brought me through safely with your refusal to quit on me, your persistent love, and your fierce determination to keep loving me until I could feel it. It worked. All of that love you gave that I could not feel at the time, I am feeling now, with a clear head, in retrospect.

I’m in a constant state of atonement these days Read the rest of this entry »


Logan Lynn (2009)

So…OH MY GOD. I never get sick, but found myself completely taken down last Sunday with the seasonal flu (thankfully, not of the Swine variety) and am just now, 4 days later, starting to feel like myself again.

I spent the week in bed…on the couch, actually. While I was laying here, once the horror of the first couple days of it passed, I was able to think about stuff and write a bit. That’s ALL I was able to do, actually, as moving around was pretty much out of the question until today and I ran out of DVD’s and stuff on TIVO about 20 hours in.

One of those thoughts I had was how lucky I am to have my health. I regret being so hard on this body of mine for so many years…I wish I had learned much of what I’ve taken to heart over the past two years a decade ago, but that’s not how the story goes and I feel grateful to be here in one piece, healthy and present in my life today.

I like the idea that things can always move forward…that I can take my human experience and change its course at any moment. I want so badly to make right the things I have wronged in my short time on this earth, and find myself in a constant state of atonement, not just with the universe, but with myself as well.

I am turning 30 in two weeks & I’m really grateful to be here with all of you…HEALTHY and on the road to some brighter place. Oh, and I recommend that you go get a flu shot. That shit was GNARLY.